


Home Alone'd Is Definitely A Verb

by heartsdesire456



Series: 25 Days of Fandom [3]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Christmas, Gen, Humor, Kid Fic, Scott is a Good Friend, Stiles is a Little Shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-05
Updated: 2014-12-05
Packaged: 2018-02-28 06:18:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2721845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartsdesire456/pseuds/heartsdesire456
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles and Scott's plot to trap Santa doesn't end as well as they hoped it would.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Home Alone'd Is Definitely A Verb

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so this is part of 2 series only because the christmas series is a bunch of TOTALLY unrelated christmas fics, BUT this fic fits into the other series very well.. So it's both.
> 
> Also I know I said I would make it a series and then never did. Ummmm now I have? I promise I do plan more!!! I just haven't had any inspiration hit!

Scott looked at the construction paper drawing Stiles had laid in front of him as soon as he got to Scott’s room one more time then looked up at Stiles. “Are you sure this is a good idea?” he asked, sounding out the bigger words to himself. “What is a- a in-kin-dary bomb?” he asked worriedly.

“Incendiary, Scotty! That means fire!” Stiles said brightly. “I watched Home Alone last night, I’m an expert on making fire now,” he said with a dismissive wave of his hand. 

Scott’s eyes widened dramatically. “ _Fire_?! We can’t make fire in my living room! Mom will kill us!”

Stiles shrugged. “It’s a risk we’re gonna have to take, Scott.”

Scott frowned. “Are you sure we really need to catch Santa?” he asked suspiciously. “I mean… what about the other kids?”

“Who cares about other kids?” Stiles countered. “If we catch ol’ fat boy we can get ALL the toys, Scott!”

Scott looked at the drawing again and eyed it dubiously. “But… but what about all the girl toys?”

Stiles hummed, rubbing at his chin like a bad guy on a cartoon, even though he didn’t have a beard. “You know. I think you’d look nice in a princess dress, actually,” he said and Scott perked up, smiling.

“Really? Aw thanks! You’d be a pretty good ballerina. You’re tall like the big girls at the dance recital,” Scott said and Stiles nodded.

“Now you get the idea. Girl toys, boy toys, it’s all _toys_ ,” he stressed. “C’mon, Scotty, we can figure something out. Barbie Doll bowling, spy disguise makeup, painting with nail polish, and not to mention, all the cookies we want if we had an Easy-Bake,” Stiles pointed out.

Scott smiled brightly. “Actually I asked Santa for an Easy-Bake so we can make brownies, so I’ve got that covered.”

Stiles held out his hands. “There you go, Scott!” He tapped the side of his head. “Thinking with your tummy, that’s how you gotta do it. Smart going, Buddy,” he said, clapping Scott on the shoulder. “I asked for a crossbow, but somehow I doubt my dad would let me keep it.”

Scott frowned. “What would you do with that, though? Crossbows are used to _kill animals_!” he stressed.

Stiles shrugged. “Yeah, OR you tie a rope to the arrows and make an escape line like Batman,” he pointed out and Scott smiled suddenly.

“Oh yeah! That would be cool!” He looked back at the drawing. “But Stiles… how do you build an in-sin-diry bomb?” he asked. “And why do you wanna make Santa catch on fire?”

Stiles waved a hand. “That’s just in case he tries to escape. All we really need are the trip wires, the super glue, and the double sided tape. And to make sure your mom doesn’t get up in the middle of the night and get stuck in the Santa Trap,” he added.

Scott nodded sagely. “What about your dad at your house?” he asked.

“I think Dad’s got work, so it’ll be all fine. He won’t even be home until morning, so if I get up early enough, I can go see if I caught him or if you did. If I caught him, I’ll hide the loot under my bed until after we get bad from visiting my mom at the hospital,” Stiles explained.

Scott frowned. “Wait… what do I do if I catch him? My mom’s gonna be home! She might set him free!”

Stiles shook his head. “Psh, just get up before she does. If you catch him, steal the toys and hide them behind the couch. Your mom doesn’t ever look back there, I’d say, going by much dust I found when I hid there for hide and seek.”

Scott gaped. “THAT is where you were?! Stiles! My mom thought you got lost! We went out looking for you!” he accused.

Stiles smiled smugly. “Yep! And I’m the champion of hide and seek for it!” He rolled up his map, furtively glancing around. “Now hide this, Scotty, and don’t let anybody find it and ruin our trap! If I don’t catch Santa, you have to, got it?”

Scott nodded seriously. “Got it.”

~

John yawned as he dropped into his desk, opening up the takeout he’d just reheated in the break room. Two in the morning on Christmas Eve wasn’t the busiest time to be in law enforcement, that was for sure. Just as he opened his mouth to take a bite of his burger, his phone rang. He sighed and dropped the burger and grabbed the phone off his desk, careful not to let the cord knock over his soda. “Stilinski.”

“STILINSKI!” an angry voice hissed.

John frowned. “Melissa? What are you-“

“If you do not get your ASS to my house in the next ten minutes and HELP ME OUT OF HERE, I’m going to kick-“

“Whoa, whoa, Melissa,” he said calmly. “Melissa, where is ‘here’? Are you in trouble? Why did you call me directly?”

“Because this has YOUR CHILD written all over it!” she hissed. “There’s a stocking full of glitter all over my living room! There’s duct tape wrapped around my hands! There is wrapping paper SUPER GLUED TO MY HAIR!” she growled. “I have no clue where the wire around my ankles came from, but I’m glad I had my tetanus shot. There is no way Scott came up with this, so whatever the hell is going on, it’s on _yours_ , John! Your little demon spawn!”

John groaned, letting his head drop back over the back of his chair. “Oh God, _Stiles_ ,” he sighed. He heard Melissa swear and a thud and cringed. “Give me ten minutes and I’ll be right there,” he said, hanging up before her swearing could grow more colorful. He stood up and grabbed his coat, only to stop just as he stepped away from his desk and turn back to pick up the phone. He better make sure the babysitter wasn’t similarly trapped.

He dialed quickly and when the other end picked up he grimaced to himself. “Hi, Laura, it’s me. Sorry to wake you, but can you make sure Stiles didn’t set booby-traps in the living room? No, I’m serious. Okay, just be careful, alright? Okay. Thanks.” He hung up and shook his head silently as he headed out to his car so he could go rescue Melissa. On the way there, he knew he shouldn’t laugh, but he couldn’t help but think about the fact Stiles and Scott had managed to land Scott’s mom covered in glitter, wrapping paper, and tied up in wire and duct tape. 

Stiles was _sooo_ dead, but at least he was inventive in his horrible schemes. 

~

(“And that’s how Scott and I discovered there was no Santa,” Stiles explained to his and Scott’s English teacher while half the kids in the class practically fell out of their seats laughing.)


End file.
